To the Girl I’ve Always Hated

I admit. I hated you so much that I think about you up to this day. I couldn’t understand how people would do that. Sleep with someone who was already committed to someone else.

To tell you the truth, I didn’t really know what the hell happened between you and my boyfriend. It’s still a mystery and let’s just say that up to now, my imagination of what happened is what happened.

I am writing this today to tell you that I forgive you. Yes. I forgive you. I understand now that it wasn’t entirely your fault. Yes you may have know about me but you were a victim of circumstance and possibly a bit of loneliness and longing for someone to love you.

I don’t know if you loved him that time. But if you did, I know how it feels. I asked him to choose and he chose me. He promised he will never talk to you again and that must have hurt. I’m sorry if he hurt you when he chose me over you. I’m sorry that he made you feel loved and then just left you.

Maybe you were great together but the timing was just not right. Maybe you were just a fling but you didn’t know that. Maybe you knew but the brief happiness was worth the mistake.

Thing is, I now know how you must have felt and I don’t blame you anymore. Sometimes we are not that strong. Sometimes we give in to the allure of happiness even if its only for a brief moment in time. Sometimes we make believe that it’s real when really it’s a mere illusion of what could have been had he loved you more than he loved someone else.

I’m sorry if you gave him a piece of yourself that you can never take back. All those times you were there for him to make him smile or those times you were there when he asked you to be there for him. All those times you worried and cared. All those times you loved.

I get it now. It hurts like crazy when you love but can’t expect anything in return because he was never yours to begin with.

I get it now and I forgive you.

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